All dat going orn in Triniland eh makin it easy tuh blog orn one topic dese days nah.

Plus, when yuh see any possible subject done get beat up in de parse, pickin anyting does  now get hard. I call it wantin tuh avoid de dead horse syndrome. It so bard even ting ah should celebrate not immune.

De Soca Princesses come tuh mind.

While I glad dey win an movin orn tuh de next rounds, is how dey reach dat worrisome. Yes dey drop ah baker’s dozen orn dem hapless ‘Spicettes’ from Grenada buh why dat route? I see highlights ah de goals an tuh say I wasn’t impressed is ah understatement. Ah see why dey couldn’t take de smood sailin route into de next rongs. Is ingrained weakness at all levels an genders ah T&T football. Dem weaknesses does limit how far any team does reach.

Oops. Ah didn’t mean tuh digress an pelt lash at ah dead horse dey nah.

Anyway ah get saved from mih dilemma dis rongs. Ah email drop in mih lap just so an save mih tail.

Still, de email was ah unwelcomed blast from de past when technology an it misuse first start treatenin man’s progress. All dat was needed was more access tuh dat technology.

Well now technology, tuh use ah Trini $6.71 cents word, ubiquitous. Is like tuh prove everybody have it dey does have tuh show how dey could be dotish. Dey regressin but, at dey own speed. Wid advanced apologies tuh de pigs in Animal Farm, some ah we more equal dan de udders.

Dis email, ah variation ah de infamous Nigerian Scam, pop up just so in mih inbox, de same way dem udder scam emails used tuh pop. In it, somebody who might be ah invention ah de writer’s imagination, was offerin mih pigtail bucketl after pigtail bucket full ah money. Same way dem udder scammers used tuh do. De onlyest requirement was me being drop dead dotish an pliable. No different ah requirement dan what dem udder scammers used tuh hope for.

An here I was, tinking de pool ah people dat dotish was so small scammers went lookin fuh greener pastures. Dis email suggest udderwise.

Ah know why too.

De supposed dominant life form orn de planet regressin real quick.

Notice how quick we does be tuh believe more an more dubious ornline claims. As long as people vouch fuh dem. Is like we so lazy we let udders fact check fuh we. Critical tinkin dead.

Just days before dis email, me an mih pardnah was doin we usual — solvin Triniland latest issues — when de tork turn tuh someting circulatin ornline about de origin ah de word, “picnic”. An it was circulatin in a prestigious group.

Given de brainpower in dat circle, ah was expectin tuh hear de prevailin belief ah which part de word originate get shoot dong. Not so an I was soon wonderin about de availability of ah bull pistle two preferably since mih plan was tuh swing wid both hands when ah wade into dem brainiacs.

Yes de technology train movin at ah scary rate makin we regression scarier. Tuhday, tuh believe anyting yuh read widout givin it de smell test dangerous.

By tomorrow it go be official an yuh cyar believe no picture yuh see ornline.

Next week, de same go be true fuh audio, even eef it imbedded in video.

So why we makin it easy fuh who developin all dis dubious technology?

Dis time arong it eh go be like dat Memorix question.

Dem poor Trinis who went an use RBC over-accommodatin orn line customer service tuh tief money from ATMs. Ah bet dey eh know I was goin an rope dem in tuh all dis. Ah well.

Free money? What is dat? Dey eh realize how dotish dey was? De onlyest ting dey eh leave behind was dey name an address written in capital letters. Ah hope dey at least did smile since dey was orn Candid Camera, Trini style. Yeah, “free money”.

Ah breach in common sense is what I call it. Ah next point ah regression.

So, why shouldn’t it have ah resurgence ah Nigerian-esque scams? Why not when we doin we best tuh shed we brains. Ent all we need is we cellphone?

Well surprise, surprise!! Dat is what speedin we devolution. Ah not exaggeratin eidder. It have a belief we risk losin we ability tuh navigate from place tuh place orn we own, eef we keep lettin GPS tell we when tuh turn left. De lake orn dat side being only ah mirage equals stupidity squared.

I agree wid dat fear because dat part ah my brain never develop. I always does get lorse. Even when it had dem paper tings call maps.

Anyway, below is dat email dat so far ah only hintin about. I eh edit one word. Ah hope reporters at de Guardian, Express an Newsday cyatch deyself before dey end up usin de same style guide. Dey nibblin ah ready.

Maybe de two souls de poleece arrest tryin tuh defraud de bank did get dat same email an it confuse dem tuh where dey tort customer service at RBC ATMs was easier tuh advantage.

Fuh who see riches in de email, feel free tuh claim your share. Is my gift tuh you. Doh worry, de majority ah we go reach your level just now de way we movin.

De way I does move I go get lorse an go reach de rest ah allyuh late.

Ah hope.

Dat email:

Morris Chandler <morris_chandler301@aol.com>

May 29 at 8:42 PM

GOOD DAY, 

This is to inform you that I came to Malaysia yesterday from Canada to seek for the payment of the beneficiaries  from Asia, Africa, Europe,  South America and the United States of America.The United Natiions in collaboration with Federal Government of Malaysia and the British Government to see that all debts owes to contractors and other beneficiaries are paid to them immediately.Right now, as directed by UN secretary General named António Guterres we should work in collaborations with these governments to ensure that your overdue payment worth $10.5M paid into your account without any delay  as approved and instructed by World Bank. 

Sincerely, you are a lucky person because I have just discovered that some top Malaysia  and Canadian Government officials are interested in your fund and they are working in collaboration with One Mr.Richard Graves from USA to frustrate you and thereafter divert your fund into their personal account.You can view this page for your perusal

http://www.un.org/News/Press/docs/2003/ik344.doc.htm We are going to pay you from our compensation fund scheme.Note that I have a very limited time to stay in Malaysia here as soon as I receive your information I will direct to our head of finance for your immediate payment.So I  would like you to urgently respond to this message with your details, so that we can work on your payment as soon as possible.

You can reach me for now with below information: 

1. Your full names:…………………..
2. Residential address:……………….
3. Telephone phone number:……………..
4.      Bank information………………………
5. Occupation………………………… 

Kindly Reply strictly through my personal email address) morris_chandler121@outlook.com 

Sincerely yours,

Mr Morris Chandler