July 1, 2017 by Fensic
“He white, black or Hispanic?”
Dem was de choices de 9-1-1 operator give mih so she could parse it orn tuh which ever poleece orficer was goin an respond tuh mih call fuh service. Ah make dat call at 2:06 a:m in sheer terror.
Faced wid dem choices at any udder time when speed wasn’t ah issue, I would ah tell she Hispanic is not ah alternative tuh black or white so give mih options ah could work wid. But, wid how friggin scared I was of de man leanin over mih gate fuh de parse too many minutes, all I wanted was de poleece tuh reach quick.
Ah pick Hispanic.
She say wait fuh de car. Ah wrap mih fingers tighter arong de knife handle an whisper tanks in dis voice even me eh recognize.
Ah been scared before buh never like dis. Ever. It even had ah time ah should ah seen terror buh it didn’t it show up until late. Ah was headin tuh work dis Friday mornin an de car pick up ah skid, orn de highway too. Imagin, me an mih own car battlin fuh control ah it. De poor steerin wheel in de middle. Even doh de car end up bouncin ah retainin wall, I considered dat ah victory fuh me. When de fight started, de car was doin like 60, when it hit de wall, probably 5 tuh 10. Was only when ah replay de episode dat fear reach — LATE. It eh ask what it miss doh.
Was a different story now wid me grippin dat knife. I eh know how big mih eyes was buh dey had tuh be sizeable.
Ah start stratigizin:
“Eef dat fool open dat gate an buss dong mih door, one ah we goin an dead in dis place so which part tuh stick de knife fuh he tuh bleed out? Ah might only get tuh pelt one good jook. He neck someplace?”
“Ah hear blood does make ah knife slippery an me eh want mih hand tuh slip an my palm get slice open. Should I wrap de handle in clort?” Yes, ah actually tort about dat.
“What eef dis fella frightenin mih no end . . . what eef ah freeze when he buss dong de door an he snatch mih knife?”
Since me eh wanted tuh answer dat larse one ah decide tuh leave evidence just in case.
Ah call de onlyest person who come tuh mih mind right away. My terror was more important den dey Stage 4 sleep.
Nobody eh answer dey house phone an mih call gorn tuh voice mail. Dat is when ah find out yuh could be paralyzed wid fear an still steups: What ah useless skill. After steupsin, ah hang up widout leavin any message.
Ah call dey cell phone. Dat end up goin tuh voice mail too. Ah start de message wid profuse apologies fuh callin at dat hour. Ah leave as detailed information as ah could. Like what time ah call 9-1-1; what color hat de fella wearin; dat ah clutchin dis knife an how ah scared shitless. All in dis strange voice even I wouldn’t recognize. Despite sayin was me, ah still hoped dey would realize who “me” was.
Dat was de next ting ah learn about me an serious fear. It does paralyze some people, udders does get wild screamin an ting. Not me. Not dis soon anyways. Fear make mih voice drop all de parts mixed tuhgedder tuh make me sound like me. No bass, no stereo. My voice sound like how mih bake does come out widout bakin powder.
As soon as ah hang up, mih phone vibrate. Ah put de call orn speaker an immediately recoil in shock. Ah rush tuh take it orf speaker before anybody say ah word. He eh suppose tuh know I watchin him an tellin somebody.
De tongue lashin ah get fuh callin after, “2.00 in de damn mornin” was just fuh my ears anyway. Ah explain mih plight again.
Horrors of horrors!
Ah eh seein de hat. It was mostly all ah could ah make out widout gettin close tuh de window tuh peep good. Now it gorn.
He gorn too or he crouchin, waitin fuh mih tuh show mihself so he could pounce?
Where de poleece? Ah call like two minutes ago. Why dey cyar reach yet an take dis fool tuh de grong? Jam ah knee in he neck an slap orn de handcuffs! Apologize later.
Ah agree tuh call de person back once de poleece reach an do what ah wanted.
Puttin dong de one ting ah train in mih mind orn how tuh use, ah crack de door tuh peep before goin out.
I eh put de knife dong cause ah dotish, or so ah believed. Ah put it dong cause eef I went outside an some adrenaline junkie poleece orficer come screechin up an see me wid dat knife, I mightn’t be able tuh drop it farse enough fuh he, or she since dem does shoot first too.
Just goin outside might ah been ah dotish move doh. Buh dammit, is my place. Is my space. Ah refuse tuh stay paralyzed in fear!
When ah crack de door an peep, de same hat ah see through de blinds was orn ah head attached tuh ah body wid legs strollin parse mih gate. Once it all parse, ah get de courage tuh follow; wid only mih eyes of course. De figure lurch dong de block an turn de corner.
Ah remember what de 9-1-1 operator tell mih: “Wait fuh de car.”
So where dis blasted car 35 minutes later an countin?
Wid lights flashin an sirens blarin, any poleece car leavin de station tuh rush an help my petrified arse standin as far back in mih place as it could, in de dark, knife in hand, heart like ah tassa drum, should ah reach in five minutes. Give it six tops, so close de station I is. But, as far as I know it wouldn’t ah be comin from dey; would be wherever de closest available orficer on patrol was.
Given mih brush wid what was ah potential crime an de absolute fear it evoke, mih torts turn tuh Triniland.
Trinis does get dis kind ah unacceptable service from de TTPS?
I waitin over 35 minutes, how long Trinilanders does wait?
I eh takin dis layin dong nah. Not wid de kind ah terror I feel an no help.
Tomorrow I callin de poleece an complain.
Mih bravado an voice back. Ah fearless again.
Well now is tomorrow.
Me an polite orficer, tryin tuh be helpful, discuss what happen an eh happen after ah call 9-1-1. He tell mih how overworked dey is. Eef I only know how much calls dey does get. Dat mine probably get ah low priority. He claim ah orficer probably eventually parse by an eh see nuttin rong. I ask why dat orficer eh confirm all was well. He tell mih ah fine now. He even mention how he does pay taxes too an would want help just like me eef he call de poleece. Like he fuhgettin he is dat poleece an does carry ah gun. He stance was nuttin eh happen tuh mih. While true physically, I reject dat dotish implication but ah keep cool. He say he hope ah understand.
Yeah orficer ah understand. I understand eef ah call allyuh fuh help I might not get it cause allyuh overworked an somebody does triage we calls.
I not comforted in de least nah orficer. Not when all it go take is one triage gorn deadly rong.
Dat could ah be my 9-1-1 call oui.
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