I would cancel 2015 an start de year over eef ah had dat kind ah power. False starts shouldn’t be only fuh people who does run, like Usain Bolt, since de rest ah we is part ah de human race.

Cute phrasin aside, dis year eh start good. We need tuh stop it now, before tings really get out ah hand. What happen in de ten, twelve days when people was wishin one annuder happy new year an all de best fuh 2015? All dat love flowin an groups ah happy people eh run into each udder tuh share positive vibes?

While de endless murders fuh de year cyar be ignored, it eh dem why I proposin dis drastic action. After all, larse year start orf more violent buh I eh call fuh it tuh restart. So what eef de newspapers focusin on every murder so far dis year? By March dey go be concentratin dey ink on udder tings.

It eh Kamla why ah want ah do-over. She in full election mode givin ah speech on why tuh re-elect de PP when listeners expectin she tuh explainin de effects ah de drop in oil prices on de country.

Who not in full election mode doh understand politics. My pardnah, de PNM-till-ah-dead man does try dat wid mih. He is de man who does remember de names ah classmates from Standard One. Look how long ago dem days was. Fuhget names, I doh even remember some ah dem people ever existin. Ah doh recall dey color, dey race, dey gender, not ah damn ting. Yet he insistin we used tuh pitch marble.

When he start complainin about de PP leavin de treasury empty, ah does ask him eef he know any udder party dat do dat before. Dat is when he memory does come like mines. Anyting tuh make he side look good.

As fuh Kamla? She understand Politics 101. Dat it eh about what true buh what yuh could get people tuh believe. Eef people believe she, she go get ah A Plus grade come election.

Restartin de year over, eh about Griffith who continuin tuh make ill-timed stabs at gettin people tuh believe he rants while he tryin tuh stick it tuh de PNM. “It eh politics”, he like tuh claim. Of course is not politics Gary, of course.

It also not about actin CoP Williams an he questionable statements concernin dat tape showin de TTPS response tuh ah call fuh service in Barrackpore. De one where de poleece make ah tactical retreat. Ah know people say it end in ah shoot-out buh I watch de tape. It hard tuh call what ah see, ah shoot-out. Mih hope is dat tape not representative of how de TTPS does respond tuh robberies in progress, Ah tink ah understand better now how bandits does get away over an over. Ah go circle back on dis.

While all dem an udder tings of de parse ten days play in mih call tuh restart de year someting else push mih over de edge doh.

Martin Joseph.

I wasn’t no fan ah how he manage de Ministry ah National Security. He might ah be de deep futuristic tinker ah hearin now, buh durin dat time he came across as ah intermittent visitor from ah parallel universe.

Hearin he drown hit mih hard. Dat eh suppose tuh happen tuh de average govahment minister. Not in Triniland, not anyplace. Someting rong wid ah year startin wid what happen tuh he. On dat basis ah makin mih call fuh ah rollback ah de year, erasin all dat happen so far an startin over.

While his death hit mih hard, someting else get mih all emotional; as in cussin up ah storm.

Lord ah hope ah could keep it tuhgedder tuh tork about dis.

De Under 20 Soca Warriors draw 2 – 2 wid archrivals Jamaica larse night.

De warriors score two goals early early an was lookin good. Mih head was full ah torts.

Eef Jamaica beg we nice we only go give dem five.

It too soon tuh start givin dat new Jamaican fella on de job fatigue?

Den ah start noticin tings.

De team startin tuh play like it done win de game an only waitin fuh de referee tuh blow he whistle or what?

Like dem fellas doh want no more goals or what, how come dey missin goal after goal so?

Like dem fellas eh want tuh dutty dey tugs.

Jamaica, who doh want T&T beat dem in anyting end up scorin twice in like de larse ten minutes includin extra time. Is true, ah went an lorse mih head. Ah get so pissed ah wish it had like two more minutes in de game so Jamaica could score more.

Ah must be bounce mih head tuh include dat game in mih call fuh ah anudder new-year when ah know how it is wid we sports teams. Dat probably say ah lot about mih priorities, ent?

Buh dammit, somebody born in T&T have tuh have ah killer instinct.

Figuratively eh.

In sports?

Against Jamaica?

De year eh start much better outside ah T&T. Ah former mayor ah New York dead ah ole age, ah popular sports commentator lose he battle against cancer. Ah man throw he five-year old daughter orf ah bridge. While it eh happen in de new year, ah still includin de crashed AirAsia plane. Family member spend de start ah de year in agony while searchers look fuh de wreckage.

Ah not marginalizin de pain all families involved in tragedies feel but de events in France over de larse few days unsettlin. Dat is mih second biggest argument fuh ah chance tuh start over. Especially how T&T’s Gary Griffith usin dat event tuh score political points dat not even cheap; dey worthless.

He really tink it wise tuh suggest, fuh jihadist tuh hear, dat T&T ready fuh de kind ah madness dat happen in an arong Paris?

He doh need tuh justify de govahment orderin armored personnel carriers. Tell dotish people tuh look arong an see why. Dey way he torkin he plan must be tuh bounce dong terrorists wid dem APCs.

Not tuh be left behind, de actin CoP’s utterances just as meaningless. He say de officer who got shot in de bar “shoot-out” would ah get shot de same place even eef he had orn ah bullet resistant vest.

Brilliant.

So eef I take dat logic tuh de next level, he suggestin it doh make sense poleece wear dey protection cause dey could geh shot in places not protected? I eh go even border tuh ask what ah officer, 7 months on de job, doin be heself kickin in ah door wid no help arong?

Dese two people need tuh focus on criminals who terrorizin T&T an not jump up an dong defendin de indefensible. Fix what broken.

Maybe de udder reason ah want de year tuh start over, besides Martin Joseph, is so people like dese two can get ah second chance tuh keep dey traps shut, just in case He, Him, do one in charge, not ah Trini.