Step forward wid yuh proof eef you tink your accent does save yuh from ah world ah hurt. Quick, cause ah about tuh tell ah tale dat prove ah Trini accent does do more savin dan anybody else accent.

Ah new job ah just start begin all dis. I was goin an be one ah dem people who does live in one state, get on ah plane on Sundays wid dey suitcase an backpack an fly tuh dey job in ah next state. When Fridays reach dey take dey suitcase now full ah dutty clothes, jump back on ah next plane an return tuh dey home. Between Sundays an Fridays dey does live in ah hotel all expenses ultimately paid for by somebody else. Every mornin dey in de hotel dey does dress up—men in tie an jacket an ting. Wid dey computer dey does head tuh dey temporary orfice. On Friday nights when dey reach back home dey clothes does get washed an dey suitcase repacked. Dey does be ready tuh take orf on Sunday again.

Dat was goin an be me. Ah road warrior nah.

Ah tort ah was ready. Buh yuh could never be ready fuh dat kind ah grind. If yuh like me, yuh have tuh make yuh own travel arrangements payin fuh everyting fuss den waitin tuh get reimbursed. Ah wasn’t ready so ah find out de hard way dat eef yuh eh make plans at least two weeks in advance yuh mightn’t find ah hotel room an airfares go be high. When yuh have tuh front de money yuh does look fuh ways tuh cut how much yuh take out yuh pocket. Dat was me. In de end it wasn’t until larse week almost done before ah start lookin fuh hotels fuh dis week.

De best ah could do was find ah room fuh Sunday an Monday. Ah had tuh take it wid de idea ah findin an next one before Tuesday night.

Tuesday evening reach. De orfice empty except fuh me. Ah on de phone an Internet callin an searchin. Mih new borse back way ah livin searchin too. Dat might sound good buh when yuh borse tell yuh he find ah hotel two an ah half-hours commute from de job, dat cyar be good. Not when Google tellin you is two train, plenty bus, ah 25-minute walk an two taxi yuh have tuh take tuh reach de orfice. Dat make yuh vex when you done reject de hotel dat was ah hour an ah half away an yuh only had tuh take two train, one bus, an one taxi.

Lucky fuh me de room he find in dat hotel was fuh smokers. I wasn’t touchin nuttin or inhalin de stale air in ah room full ah de disgustin smell ah second hand smoke. Fuhget sleepin on de bed. Mih borse agree. Den he find ah place dat was chargin more dan what de company does allow fuh hotel rooms. He is de borse so ah make ah reservation fuh de rest ah de week usin de company reservation system. Ah head out fuh de bus. Yes bus cause ah was short on taxi money. Besides, what could happen after ah get orf de bus?

On de bus, ah find out de driver eh know which stop ah was torkin about. An wid it being so dark outside ah did see trouble ahead. Ah passenger save de day, ah mean night, by tellin mih it was two more stops.

Mih phone ring.

Was de travel agency dat does book de reservations in de back end ah de company system.

Dey had bad news.

De hotel tell dem dey own reservation system was dong so no record ah my reservation reach dem. Besides she say dey say dey eh have no room.

She wanted tuh know eef she should try an find someplace else.

Someplace else?

It so dark you need ah ah flambeau. De dutty clothes in mih suitcase done start makin it heavy; mih backpack heavier. Ah tired. Ah hungry an she want tuh send mih orf in ah next direction when ah eh even know which one ah goin een? Hell no ah tell she. I goin tuh de hotel an fight wid dem cause me eh do nuttin wrong so I eh sufferin from de two ah dem dotishness.

Ah leavin out de part where ah get orf de bus an get lorse. It wasn’t because it was dark since when ah did get lorse in Tobago earlier dis year it wasn’t dark yet. It was by de time mih cousin find mih. I just directionally challenged.

Ah also go leave out how humiliatin it was sittin in de man car while he keep drivin five feet, stoppin, lookin at mih an bussin out laughin, like eef it was funny.

On dis Monday night ah car stop. De driver ask mih eef ah want ah drop. Want ah drop? Who say it eh have no God?

De only ting dat stop mih from divin een de backseat an telling de man tuh drive was mih Trini upbringin. Ah politely enter he car, sayin goodnight tuh de woman up front. Ah tell dem where ah was headin. He drive orf in de same direction I was goin when he stop fuh mih. Ah look at mih cell phone: We was headin away from de hotel.

What would ah happen tuh mih eef he hadn’t stopped?

When we reach de hotel ah tank dem an gorn een de hotel, my belly done ban. Ah was ready tuh show ah could act like mih mudder drag mih up instead ah bringin mih up. Buh ah change mih strategy. Ah didn’t know it buh ah was about tuh rely on mih Trini accent.

Ah explain what happen tuh de people behind de front desk. Dey tell mih dey know buh still eh have no room. Ah could feel de vexness raisin in mih chest. Ah tell dem before ah use mih company reservation system ah started wid dey own hotel system an it was allowin mih tuh book ah room so how come dey sayin dey eh have no blasted rooms. Ah cool dong quick. Ah explain ah was tired an only wanted ah bed an ah place tuh bade. Ah toss in ah iron. Dey say dey go see what dey could do. Dey come back tuh confirm dat is all ah want. Ah nod yes. Dey tell mih dey had one room under repairs but would have tuh wait till repairs done.

Long story short, arong midnight dey escort mih tuh de room. It wasn’t in de system ah get warned. Since nobody was supposed tuh be in it, I was tuh avoid de front desk in de mornin; de room was complimentary. When I did reserve de room it was $260 US ah night. All ah could do was shake dey hand.

Who want tuh argue accent eh had nuttin tuh do wid nuttin go ahead. I disagreein.

Who tink dey accent does do better, bring it come.

Trini accent does save de day over an over.

Ask any Trini.

Ask me.