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First Emailgate, now Dreamgate?

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August 10, 2013 by Fensic

Ah pardnah tell mih he know somebody who does dream in chapters over several nights. Me eh even know dat was possible.

Ah did know right away when ah hear de details in de sample he give mih dat ah had tuh get permission tuh parse it along. It timely fuh so. People could make up de own minds on dis one, no foreign experts needed, ah say tuh mihself.

De permission tuh parse along de dream say ah cyar lie in it, so ah doin’ dat. Judge fuh yuhself?

“Boy is nearly two weeks an’ dat licks still have mih sore. Ah never get beat dis bard before.”

“Which one you is again, Kamla or Khadijah?”

She steups.

“How de cut-arse make yuh feel?”

She peered into de shadows buh still couldn’t make him out. Was he tall or short, light-skin or dark-skin? Did he wear glasses? Fuh dat matter she wasn’t even sure eef he was Indian, not dat ethnicity mattered. All she could see was de faint outline of ah figure in de dim light.

“Ah feel like de people eh understand mih. How dey could believe he lies. Like de truth eh count.”

“Troot?” he barked.

She jump. Like somebody turn de knob all de way up on he voice.

“Since when politics is about troot”, he continued, de words tumblin’ out he mout. “Ah tink yuh only sayin’ dat cause yuh side lorse. Yuh fuhget how you come in power or what? It eh about troot. Is about what yuh could get people tuh believe.” He paused.

Since she eh say nuttin he continued.

“Yuh gettin’ bard advice, yuh know dat?”

“Yuh mean from you now?”

He steups.

“Yuh cyar take ah joke or what?”

“I doh give spiritual advice eh cause me eh no Juliana Pena.”

“An’ me eh no Patrick Manning.”

Both ah dem laugh.

“So what political advice yuh lookin’ for? Who send yuh by me anyways?”

“Ah here so doh study who send mih. What ah need tuh know is how tuh deal wid dis man.”


“He self.”

Dis victory in Chaguanas West, she continued, “It eh good fuh de country. It only go make mih job harder.”

He listened.

“Yuh hear de dotish tings dem jokey experts say election night? Some ah dem say he win is a paradigm shift. Dey act surprised ah black man representin’ Indians.”

“Like dey forget who clean up de seat in 2010 or what”, he chimed een.

She ignored him.

“Dey tork about he being de face ah de opposition. What wrong wid Rowley face? De PP like dat face.” She was on ah roll.

“It had commentators who say he could be de next prime minister.”  

She pause but he stay silent.

“Jack Warner? Prime Minister? Ah Trinidad an’ Tobago? Dem people mad or what? De man is ah pest.”

“Yuh callin’ him ah pest? Lyndira eh just leave you an’ join up wid he?”

We stronger widout she. Just now we go replace she in de Senate, watch an’ see.”

“Yuh know, ah always wanted tuh ask yuh dis. How come yuh tun on Jack so? Yuh was he staunchest supporter den suddenly yuh planassin’ de man like yuh is Tim Gopeesingh son. What happen?”

She inhale like she was preparin’ ah long answer but before she could say ah word he cut she orf at de knees.

“Doh bodder, yuh was gettin’ bad advice.”

She tack orn ah groan tuh de loud sigh she make.

Feelin’ cornered, she start lookin’ arong. Behind where he voice was comin’ from dis curtain was hangin’ like it dead,. After de curtain she could make out ah partially open door. He voice cut short de visual tour ah de place.

“I could certainly give yuh advice. Exactly what yuh want tuh happen tuh Jack?”

“Ah want he political career tuh done. Ah want he gorn. Ah want de people tuh fuhget about he.”

“What about de people in Chaguanas West?”

“Like yuh eh hear what ah say ah want or what?”

“So yuh want tuh be ruthless.”

“Doh get woman leaders vex. We does bite like ten batchack.”

“What de arse dat have tuh do wid anyting?”. When he was done suckin’ he teet it was dong tuh business.

“Right now yuh courtin’ Jack, tellin’ him tuh come back home.”

She short quick nods of agreement make she look like she was gettin’ shock by current when she was only tryin’ tuh not take precious time away from de advice tuh come.

He eh take orn she nods.

“Keep orn doin’ dat.”


She jump.

‘CRACK’ again. He was slowly crackin’ he fingers. She skin start tuh crawl.

“Keep courtin’ he buh only now yuh go be playin’ dead tuh cyatch corbeaux alive.”

“How yuh meanin?”

“All what yuh doin’ wid he in de news, not so?”


“Use it tuh yuh advantage den. Both he an’ de papers love fuh people tuh read what dey say.”

She lean forward eagerly.

“Sometimes me eh know which one ah dem like more bacchanal, he….”

He cut she orf.

“ ….. dat skill mudders continually use tuh make it song like dey wayward chile shot was ah saint? Use it here. Only yuh just want yuh harden man-chile tuh listen an’ come back home. Bend over backwards eef yuh have to. Everybody go eat it up, especially how you go look weak.”

“Playin’ dead?”

“Exactly. Yuh might have tuh go against some ah yuh ministers doh. Dey cyar get parse yesterday being yesterday an’ tomorrow being tomorrow.”

Outside in de distance, ah pot houng start barkin’.

“Dat cyar be de whole plan, right?”

“Nah, it have more buh dis part important so tink about it some more.”

“Yuh doh have ah next plan? No udder advice?”

“Nuttin dat go make you look good.”

She tort fuh ah moment.

“Ah like how yuh does move. Dem udders? All dey does say is ‘do dis, do dat’. Nuttin eh gettin’ explain. Tell mih de rest ah de plan?”

“So yuh tink yuh could make him ah member ah yuh cabinet again widout de cabal gettin’ vex?”

“He used tuh say dat word. I is mih own borse doh. I is de prime minister.

He chuckled.

“While yuh dey butterin’ he up ah want yuh tuh contact de Americans on de sly. Nobody cyar know. Not even Gregory.”

“De Americans? What for? Why ah cyar tell mih husband?”

 “Tink Kamla. TINK!”

She eyes shoot plenty daggers in he direction.

“It eh de IRS dat everybody sayin’ want Jack?”

She studied what he say fuh ah minute den buss out ah laugh.

“Man you good oui. I would ah never tink ah anyting dat diabolical.”

“Not diabolical – politically sound. I not into what politically expedient like de cabal.”

She nod she head in agreement.

“Ah warnin’ yuh again eh. Mess dis advice up an’ not only yuh dorgs dead, buh he go be de next prime minister.”

“Just tinkin’ ah he in dat position is all de motivation ah need yes.”

Both ah dem fall silent fuh ah moment. He break it.

“Jack Warner as prime minister.”

She cringe an’ try tuh counteract de image one time.

“Ah have just de ministerial position fuh he tail. He go have tuh travel.”

Suddenly she sat up, “wait, ah just tink ah someting.”

Quietness in de room.

She eyes dart tuh where de curtain was. It was gently swayin’. She squint, tryin’ tuh focus on de door behind de curtain. It was closed.

 “Yuh still here?”

“Yuh gorn or what?”

In de distance de pot houng was howlin like it see ah jumbie.

She made ah mental note tuh call de US in de mornin’.

Fuh de first time she notice de clock.

De time was 21:13:51.

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August 2013
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Various topics

Torkin by month

2018 small wine?


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